May I have a word about… the abominable lexicon of lockdown

I’d like to start this week by offering a big vote of thanks to Correo diario columnist Sarah Vine. Oh please, don’t be like that. Come back and let me explain why. en un recent column, ella escribió: “Lockdown has generated a lexicon all of its own, most of it deeply irritating. My new pet hate is ‘being remoted into’, as in, ‘Clive is self-isolating, but he’s being remoted into via Zoom for the 11 o’clock.’’’ I’m glad to say that this one is quite new to me but what an abomination and I’d like to thank Vine for bringing it to my attention. Clearly a woman after my own heart. Bien, up to a point.

I’ve had occasion in the past to rail against the practice of making certain words into plurals. You know the sort of thingbehaviours, resultados, actions, mitigations. Always unnecessary and tiresome. But just when I thought it couldn’t get any worseIn the recent kerfuffle about whether sheet music is colonialist (an argument I shan’t be drawn into, as I’m sure the readers’ editor already has quite enough on her plate), part of the Oxford professors’ report talked of “giving privilege to white musics”. I think I would be wise to leave that one there or it will do something quite unpleasant to my blood pressures.

I hope that you, como yo, enjoyed last week’s declaration, couched in delicious diplomatic speak, from Boris Johnson, Emmanuel Macron and Angela Merkel on the need, post pandemic, for a new global settlement. I particularly liked the talk of “more mutual accountability, shared responsibility, transparency and co-operation within the international system and its rules and norms”. I trust that after the continental AstraZeneca shenanigans and sabre rattling that that wasn’t the sound of hollow laughter on your part.

De todas formas, until next time and a panegyric to Priti Patel

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